I woke
in a sweat

I had a dream
that you met
someone new
and you were
happy to
be in love

But that didn’t
make sense
for someone
who insisted
you should
be alone.

That it’s better
for your art,
for your sanity.
Why would you
be with someone else?

Or did you just
say that,
knowing you were
too deep to
get rid of me.

You forget I
can read your mind
and that I still
breathe in time with you.

I know.





Kill me,
slit my wrists
with your silver

watch me
fall to the floor
sticky blood
spilling out
for you

your tshirt
to my body
with my heartache

and I will lay on the
falling apart
bleeding out
with a smile
on my face
because it’s
your doing
and I love your attention

you’re so cold

you sit
hand stretching
irritated by a razor

a stranger
in blue
polka dots

do you feel my eyes
clawing at your back
my heart
crawling toward you
bleeding for you
on the
already red carpet?

how can I act
as cool as you?
where should I put
my feelings
so they won’t be seen?

you give me goosebumps
with your cold demeanor
my fingers and toes
blue when you
decide to come near

i need some heat
or i’ll shrivel up
and die like
the flowers in
the autumn.


the end

this can’t be all there is,
you say to me
the pulling
and the yanking,
the yearning
for something
that will not exist

this feeling
in my stomach
down and down
i sink into myself
losing everything
i thought
would hold me together

and here i am
like a piece of
coffee cake
under the weight
of your fingers

you push
you push
you push

i pull
i pull
i pull

and i
will be the one
to fall on my ass
when you
finally let go